Weaning...It's not easy or fun.

Warning, this is a post with rambling thought about breastfeeding and weaning. If you're not interested you may want to skip this one...

Today I thought I would write a post on an issue I'm having at the moment. I'm sure I will never forget this stage in my life but I do want to document it just in case.

Kooper is just about to turn 15 month old. My goal with both of my kids was to nurse them until they turned 1. With Kynlie, it was a breeze nursing and weaning her at 1. Kooper, not so much. Although he's been a great nurser and we have never had a problem with latching or milk production, he will not stop. He's attached for good....I hope not HA!

I have been trying since he turned 1 in August to wean him and he has no desire what so ever to stop. At first I was ok with it. Thinking he still needs it and that's fine. But now that he's actually taking more cows milk, juice, water, etc... and eating more he's just using me as a paci.

I spent what felt like hours yesterday (and many other days) just nursing him off and on. He would get upset about something and need to be nursed. He gets tired and he needs to be nursed. He sees me walk by him and he needs to be nurse. Heaven for bid I don't stop and pick him up and nurse him, his whole world come crashing down. He will scream and scream, until I pick him up but it doesn't stop there, he still cries and pulls at me to sit down and nurse him.

Let me say, I LOVE my son more than words can explain. I LOVE the bonding moments and everything that comes from breastfeeding, but it's time to break him of this habit. He's not too old in my mind, but he is a bigger baby so it's not the easiest thing to do...especially in public.

I text my mom yesterday and told her I was going to admit my self into a loony bin because I felt like I was going to go crazy. I tried so hard yesterday to start weaning cold turkey but it was not working. It's like he heard me talking about it and wanted me more HA!

The bad thing is, if he were on a real paci I would not be breaking him of it this soon. I would wait closer to age 2 like I did with Kynlie (18 months cold turkey). How do I break him of something I can't hide or throw away?

He still wakes up in the middle of the night to nurse. At first we all thought it was because he's not full when he goes to bed because he's never been a good eater.  But recently he's been eating for us and a lot. So I know it's not the full tummy problem. It's just he wants a paci at night. I've tried giving him a real paci and he knows and wants nothing to do with. At this point, I'm ok if he got attached to a real paci at 15 months. Sounds crazy I'm sure but if it will work!

I've tried the crying it out in the middle of the night but he's woke up Kynlie a few times. That's the last thing we need is all four of us in bed and one trying to nurse. I thought I'd try and start at nap time with out nursing and see how that goes. If it works then I'll move on to bed time. I'm not sure what I'll do in the middle of the night when he wakes up. I guess we will see when the time comes.

I never thought in a million years, I would be in this position. I thought I had it all figured out when he was born. I guess he showed me :))

Wish me luck or fill free to share some advise and tips. Or feel free to come take him for a few nights and break him for me. Just kidding....kinda!